Shark Farts!

The first of what I suspect to be many of my favorite 30 Rock quotes:

"There ain't no party like a Liz Lemon party because a Liz Lemon party is MANDATORY" - Liz Lemon

"Is this a rule of threes call? I'm going to be at your funeral. I'm going to bury you!" - Betty White to Tracy Jordan

"I'm going to make your heart explode" - Devon Banks to Jack Donaghy

Drunken Disney

These are a collection of quotes from two separate occasions when I found myself intoxicated while watching Disney movies with my dearest Sheepy (Madeline, that's her nickname (don't question it)). By the way, I highly recommend this practice. Disney movies are just so much more entertaining (and dark?) while inebriated.

"It's sand tiger! You just got swallowed by sand tiger! You're dead!" -- Crystal watching Aladdin during the scene where Aladdin is buried in the Cave of Wonders

"Aladdin teaches kids that possessed shit is okay!" -- Crystal reflecting on the morals taught in Aladdin

"Why does the Beast need a prisoner?" -- Madeline watching Beauty and the Beast


"They only loved each other when they were truly themselves... That shit's a moral." -- Crystal watching Beauty and the Beast and reflecting

"He hovered his ass over there!" -- Crystal watching Beauty and the Beast during the scene where the Beast jumps all the way up his grand staircase

"You're not welcome her so get in the basement!" -- Madeline watching Beauty and the Beast imitating the Beast's logic regarding imprisoning Belle's father

Big Three, Little Three

My favorite quotable professor unleashed some gems today in lecture. I dedicate this post to him and a fellow former classmate, roommate and friend, Shelly.

"Papers are like steaks, you want all that meat!" - Jonathan Wender talking about our essays

"Go home and smell the Aspirin." - Jonathan Wender giving us our homework for the long weekend

Birthday Tre

Our waiter at Buca di Beppo was quite the personality. Unbeknowst to him, or knownst depending on who you talk to, he was dropping some pretty incredible "That's what she said" moments. Here's to you, Mr. Waiter, may your life be full of future "That's what she saids."

"I need a landing strip to put this down." - waiter at Buca di Beppo

"Let me take those dirties." - waiter at Buca di Beppo