A Cup of Apples

This past weekend was the Apple Cup in Pullman, WA. For anyone who doesn't know (apparently I have readers in Denmark??), the Apple Cup is the final football game of the season between Washington state rivals, University of Washington and Washington State. With a UW win this year, I heard a plethora of hilarious chants, drunken exclamations and words of wisdom. You decide which is which.

"My hair! I need to shave it." - Madeline Gagner, sober

"You know what? I just want a snack." - Madeline Gagner, drunk

"I don't listen to not Dave." - Crystal Komenda (Yeah, I quoted myself. Get over it.)

"Pullman sucks! Pullman sucks!" - UW student section chant during the 4th quarter of play

"UW rejects! UW rejects!" - UW student section chant while WSU football team ran onto the field

"Sark must have the biggest fucking cock." - Guy in front of me in reaction to Coach Sark going for it on 4th and 1

Ode to Allan

Allan is my amazing step-dad. He's probably one of the most subtly funny people in my life. His sense of humor is on par with mine and he says some of the greatest things. It's time the world find out about the one and only Allan Broda.

"I'm reaching for the stars!" - Allan Broda holding a star shaped cookie over his head

"I say, 'No piggy! Get off the couch!'" - Allan reenacting his conversations with his pet pig, Percy

Questioning Humor

Here's a collection of humorous questions I've heard, some older, some from earlier today. Enjoy, my readers, laugh your little hearts out (but not literally, because that's disgusting).

"So, where you guys from?" - Brian, asked about a dozen times in the span of about an hour

"Why don't you go back to where you came from?" - Customer taking to my boss

Paul: "So what are those beds like?"

Kimberly: "It's like sleeping on a cloud!"

Brian: "How many times have you slept on a cloud, Kimberly?"

WAYNE DAWSON

This post deserves an introduction. While in Charlottesville, Virginia with my roommates to see Dave Matthews Band, we met a most intriguing man by the name of Wayne Dawson. I believe we had at least a 15 minute conversation with him. I cannot attest to his sobriety (he must have left it at home), but his state did lead to some amazingly hilarious quotable quotes. I will never forget you, Wayne Dawson.

"WAYNE DAWSON! What are you going to do with me? Love me!" - Wayne Dawson introducing himself

"Beautiful, beautiful fuckin' people." - Wayne Dawson

"No more 'r' words. Rainbows!" - Wayne Dawson, whispered

A Glorious Rebirth

Due to sheer negligence, I have almost completely abandon this blog. Shame is all I feel. SHAME!

I am quite passionate about quotes, even more so when someone completely spontaneously says something hilarious. Especially if they don't realize how funny they are. I'm constantly surrounded by people who make me laugh everyday, so why haven't I updated this thing. I blame Twitter. 

My new promise: to update this blog daily. You, my loyal (pretend you are loyal) readers, deserve a daily dose of light-heartedness. I know you count on my to supply you with your joy in life (let me dream, people).

Enjoy this week old quote from one of my favorite sources of comedic material to start off the rebirth of this glorious blog:

"I have a really bad stubbed toe right now, so toes are on my mind" - Jonathan Wender, mid-lecture